Boise Men's Psychotherapist Blog

  This entry was posted on Tuesday, July 23rd, 2019 at 6:07 pm “Do you want to be safe or strong”, this is the question posed by Dr. Jordan Peterson in his book  12 Rules to Life – An Antidote to Chaos.  This speak very clearly to me as for most of my life I have wrestled with wanting to feel safe, but really wanting to be strong. Strength comes from navigating the order and chaos of life, whether internally or externally. When we are in chaos, we feel no strength at all, we’re flustered, we’re scared, we’re insecure, we’re unsure, but going through that chaos and navigating it effectively is the very road to strength. Consequently, within our thoughts/feelings of wanting to be safe can come unrest and its own set of challenges that contribute to chaos. Anxiety feels very unsafe (chaos), the ability to effectively navigate through an anxious situation creates order (strength). Struggling with the pit of darkness, feeling depressed and stuck (chaos). Putting movement/actio...

  This entry was posted on Thursday, July 18th, 2019 at 5:26 pm I have struggled with anger for the majority of my life. This may be why I personally hate the idea of going to “anger management”. I think that life is more complicated than that and the fact that you are going to simply teach me a couple tools and that will solve everything, is just not logical……to me. That being said, as a kid I could be a tyrant. I would yell and scream at teammates on the field, I would break things at home, I would destroy items in fits of rage. All of these were my temper tantrums. Sadly, it is not just kids that have temper tantrums. As a 44-year-old, married man, father to two kids, throwing temper tantrums is not setting the best example for young minds. I wish I could tell you I have mastered my outbursts, but I remain a work in progress. So, lets start to break things down to get a better handle on how we manage ourselves when angered. First thing we have to acknowledge is that anger is a v...

  This entry was posted on Wednesday, July 3rd, 2019 at 8:27 pm I can get into a pretty dark place. A place that if only exposed to others would most likely leave them looking at me in a different way. This place is scary, unnerving, potentially violent, and very toxic. For the longest time I thought I was the only one. So many years I struggled to hide real fear, dark thoughts, and even darker ideas. I felt powerless, I felt alone, I felt hopeless. I felt broken as a person, insignificant, and a worthless example of a boy/man. It was in these darkest of places that I lingered. Over the past week, my family and I were out of town. While we were gone, I had the privilege of watching the movie “A Star is Born”. I ended up liking the movie more than I ever thought I would. In the end, the movie is about a man and a woman. Each present themselves in certain light, but through the course of the film you begin to see how the presentation is a façade…….at least for one. Ultimately, the fa...

  This entry was posted on Monday, June 3rd, 2019 at 8:27 pm Hey guys, I came across this article and wanted to share. I have bullet points below, but I would highly recommend reading the article at the bottom for a thorough understanding. You can print these bullets out for a quick glance. Breathing is so pivotal in our ability to slow down, focus, and make better more pragmatic decisions………. especially in the heat of a moment. I cannot stress this enough, get proficient in your breathing exercises helps you to perform better in life……. not just athletes, but all of us. #1 Box Breathing ·         All you need to do is picture a box with equal sides, where the inhale (breath in through your nose), the holding of the breath, and exhale are all four counts (four seconds approx.). “As you take in a breath, for four counts, visualize traveling up one side of the square. Next, imagine moving across the top of the square during the four counts of holdin...